why i became inactive on instagram


As many of you may or may not have noticed, I've deleted most of my photos on my main Instagram account. Haha the reason why i said "my main account" is because i've maaaany accounts on instagram. One main, one photography, one food blog, one private, one private private, one private private private account (which had 0 followers and 0 following) and was converted to a "happy" account instead where i write down my reflective thoughts from time to time. And one more account which was filled with rants, horrible thoughts and self-hatred. Yes, which i just deleted minutes ago.

And you may think, why did I become inactive?

Well, when I first joined Instagram at the end of 2010 or beginning of 2011, it was like a totally new and foreign place to me. I barely had any friends/followers there because no one really heard of Instagram before, or even know what was it about. I started my account posting photos of my food, my friends, my selfies *coughs* and my family. I was an amateur photographer back then (not saying that i'm a professional now, but i just sucked last time.) and I never really cared how my photos looked like, as long as it looked nice to me. There was no need to edit and filter my photos on Vscocam when I could have just used Instagram's amazing filters. (*coughs again, because I don't think that's the case now.)

As years flew by, many of my friends and people decided to jump on the bandwagon as well. There, followers started to increase....the quality of my photos improved...I received more comments on my photos...Instagram totally "levelled up" and became a hot spot which was always teeming with enthusiastic individuals who loved sharing photos and selfies of themselves.

And today, as I looked back at my account, I must say i've missed the old Instagram with lesser people. But it's inevitable in a sense that, you cannot stop the crowd once something gets popular. More and more people will join, it's just a matter of time.

One day I questioned myself, "What's the true purpose of this?" I meant, posting my photos there. I couldn't come up of a valid reason for this question. What was the purpose of Instagram? I seem to have forgotten.

What I realised was that, back then when Instagram was still a ghost town, I posted photos with the purpose of sharing. I wanted to share with my followers what I did, what I ate, who my closest friends were, my family......basically my life in general.

But now, is it really for the purpose of sharing? I don't think so.

I began to ask myself, am i doing all these for the sake of "likes"? Or am I doing all these for the sake of glamour and popularity?

What's the purpose? Is it just for fame and attention?

Fyi, i hate popularity and attention. I feel that it's something that has a power to change a person drastically, to a large extent that it might possibly destroy a person. When someone is so hooked onto popularity, he/she can do something you never thought they would.

You know, I barely even log in to my main account now because my timeline is always flooded with photos of models, wannabes, friends, blah blah blah....and it's very boring. You can't deny that Instagram has a lot of popularity-driven individuals. Girls post photos of themselves in bikinis just to attract their followers' attention and comments like "OMG, you're SOOOO HOT!" or like "ABS" or like "you're seriously GOALS!" "Your body is perfect!" "I wish I could be like you..." "You're damn perfect"


And I'm just here like..........seriously? Is this what people do on Instagram? (ok disclaimer first before anything else: this is just a personal opinion. And i don't refer to everyone on Instagram, nor anyone in particular.)

You know, if you're one of those people who post photos of supposedly "GOALS" body while starving yourself everyday just for that "perfect photo" behind the screen just for the SAKE of comments saying that you're #goals or #inspiration, then I really have nothing to say. If you're doing all these just for the sake of feeling good about yourself, then you should probably stop being oblivious and be aware that you might unintentionally affect someone else. And by saying that, i meant majority of us (especially girls) who perceive beauty and perfection in the same way - slim body, pretty face, perfect make-up, etc....

It's a fact that all of us are living in a society that places a substantial amount of importance on the outward appearance of individuals. When we see photos of prettier or slimmer girls out there, we desire to be like them. We want to be like them because we think they are perfect. 

Women and girls no longer feel that pursuing beauty is an option. Instead, many females feel a pressure that they must achieve the standard of beauty presented to them, and even use beauty to define themselves.  Today we are bombarded by advertisements in the media trying to sell products related to beauty, fashion and dieting products. These advertisements can be found on television, on the internet, in magazines, on billboards, endorsed by celebrities, and even on the radio. They constant influence of these advertisements conveys that we must improve the way we look in order to be accepted by society. The pervasiveness of unrealistic beauty deals in the media creates a cycle of both the inattainability of these ideals and extreme unhappiness in girls and women.

It's so sad looking at how many of us feel and think that we're less beautiful because we're not society's standard of beauty. This so-called beauty of a huge thigh gap, protruding collar bones, toned and defined abs, flat stomach etc......body images aside, how many of us have felt so inferior when we look at pretty girls out there? And wanting to get plastic surgery to change the way we look, or apply tons of make-up and slather concealer on our faces so that we can look better.

But no, what you don't realise is that every one of you out there is already beautiful. You're already beautiful. You're enough. You're more than enough, in fact. You don't have to feel you're lesser or short of something you think you are. You're worth more than the number of times you've cried thinking how you want to be so much better or wanting to be someone else. You're worth more than the numbers on your weighing scale. The number on your weighing scale, the body you see in the mirror, your academic results, how you look outside, don't define who you are. You are you and what you are on the inside DEFINES who you are. You're beautiful. Don't let people or society tell you otherwise.

Don't seek validation from anyone. You don't require any validation from society. Just be yourself.

Well....went off point again. I had no intention to rant about how media has influenced beauty and blah blah...it just came out naturally, oops.

All in all....I still do love Instagram. Only in my other accounts though. Places where I feel that I'm truly free to post whatever I want, without feeling so insecure or worried about how others would think. I've an account that I truly love, where my timeline is so full of happy people who are able to influence me in a positive way, teach me new things about life and know what's it like to be able to connect with people from different parts of the world. And that's what you should always do - surrounding yourself with happy people, people who make you happy and make you feel better about yourself and not anything short.

That being said, my main account was something I've "built" for close to four years and it was indeed a place full of memories. So I probably won't delete it anytime soon (or maybe i will when i feel like it). Or maybe I'll just return one day and start anew. But for now, bye on @cheryyyyllll! If you've been following me since the start, thank you. I hope you surround yourself in a place where you always feel good about yourself and know that you're worth so much more. so so so much more.

Adieu to you followers! May you find joy and seek joy in the happiest of places.

(Man, why do i feel like this is a farewell post!)

Haha this post feels so empty somehow. But i'm not leaving this blog yet of course!

No harm intended in this post, just giving my two cents worth. :)

Have a lovely saturday x

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