CHERYL

housewarming party last night and i invited a small circle of my friends over!! couldn't afford to invite everyone i know because mum invited more than 85 people on her side and my house's so small so it's v crammed :( nevertheless, thanks to everyone who came down last night!!! i truly enjoyed myself seeing y'all making friends w each other HAHA and seeing my kc girls again after so long. it was such a tiring day but i hope y'all enjoyed yourself :) sorry for being such a bad host though i rly couldn't be there with y'all on both sides at the same time :(
 {sorry for the low quality photos!! wanted to take w my dslr but i lost my charger SIGH and i'm too lazy to edit every photo so.}

credits to google

you're 16 and you're sitting on the bus and there's a beautiful boy with dark eyes, so dark they almost looked black and you're so distracted by him that you almost miss your stop.
you're 16 and that same boy is all you can think about. he's the smell of warm happiness and when you kiss him he tastes sweet like love.
you're almost 17 and you and him are in love, so in love it's burning like stars in the sky. but what you don't know is that those stars are falling.
you're 17 and he's hardly been texting you back and every "i love you" that rolls off your tongue he pushes away from his lips. you're beginning to see why his eyes are so dark.
you're almost 18 and instead of counting down the days you're counting all the times he's apologised for leaving purple and blue marks on your skin when he's drowning himself in liquor.
you're 18 and you can't breathe because you walked in on him kissing another girl. you thought you didn't show him enough love but in reality there was nothing left of him to love.
you're 18 and when someone asks you if you're happy you nod and say you love him. but your parents never told you that "love and happiness is two completely different things" - they say that your eyes are the windows to your soul, his were black.

sometimes after being there all the time for everyone around you, you start to realise how people were never there for you like you were for them.

it's currently 5:24pm now and i'm still procrastinating because i'm sleepy :( so i think i'll just update this space for a bit and write a to-do list to remind myself (hopefully i can accomplish them).

so it has been 11 weeks since jc started (according to darren) and less than 6 weeks to SAs. i can't entirely say that entering JC was a good choice i've made for myself, because honestly i'm struggling a lot in school and i ask myself the same question everyday, "have i really made the right choice?"

well maybe if i could backtrack and go back to the day when i had to submit my JAE form again, i might not have taken this route. i might have decided on a course in polytechnic and i might have made the right choice then. but then again, who knows what exactly is the right choice?

life is full of decisions, and i hate it when i have to decide between one or another. sometimes i would wish that i was left with no other alternatives because that way, i wouldn't have to make a decision. but of course, it's not a good thing to be left with no other choices.

JC is indeed tough. have i ever regretted making this choice? subtly, yes. the workload is just crazy and so stressful. i thought i'd never have to go through this insane period of studying (like i did during O's) at least until A'levels and boy, i was so wrong. everyday just feels like another studying day. every morning i would wake up and tell myself that i have to be productive and complete 1. __ 2. ___ 3. ___ and i don't think there has ever been a day i've went to bed without worrying about my studies.
then there's also different events in school that we've to participate in and sometimes a few of us would be in-charge & there would be more work to do and more stress to deal with.

i gave a subtle yes because this decision was never an absolute regret. i'd never trade anything for the bunch of people i've met in school. i have never expected anything much from the friends i would meet here because getting into a new school would mean having to adapt to an entirely new environment again. & honestly i was worried i wouldn't be able to click with new friends haha because i don't get comfortable with people easily.