a thing to remember (closing summary - the end of 2013)



FINALLY - the last post of 2013 is here! i know gratitude was supposed to be the last one but i couldn't resist myself to update my blog & also thank my readers for their feedbacks, so i promise that this is gonna be the last one. (cross fingers x) i might also update about my trip daily (if i can find time) on my dayre @ cheryyyyllll - well for those who don't know what's dayre, its actually just a mobile blogging platform app. my feed is still kinda empty because i update most of my things here......well because i'm not sure whether i would have the time to blog after my trip! (i doubt so anyway). & by the time you're reading this, i've already checked in and waiting for my flight / on the plane already. ≧◔◡◔≦
but i'm down with food poisoning and this sucks. :(

{on the side note}
here's the result of the poll if you're curious about it!

tbh i felt a bit worried when more people started to vote for the closing summary, because i couldn't think of anything to blog about.
but here it is anyway hahaha.
well so,
things have been smooth for me in 2013 - not saying that it have been really easy or anything close to that, but because 2012 had been worse (or so far the worst) & i didn't expect much for 2013.
& the good thing is, i can't seem to remember any bad events which happened this year - not because bad things didn't happen to me, but because these bad things aren't bad enough to make an impact on my life.
{well if you have no idea what i'm talking about i'm sorry}

*disclaimer: not trying to preach or anything, everything is based on my personal views and no offence should be taken!* 

Part I: Be contented.

i've no idea how 2013 have been for each and everyone of you, but i do hope that it have been a good one. & i know, as we grow older, we find it difficult to be genuinely happy, much less being contented with what we have and what we do - but i guess it is all just a part of growing up.
but as they say,
happiness is a journey and not a destination.
of course, it's hard to STAY happy. but have you ever thought of this - happy or not, you're still living.
for every minute you're angry, sad, frustrated, 
you lose sixty seconds of happiness.
that's the thing about life - you can choose to feel whatever you want, but its just so hard to control your feelings.
well some of you might be reading this and thinking "please don't make life sound so easy" - exactly, life is never easy.
it is never easy, and it never will be.
but the thing is, what is easy to you? what is an easy life for you?
never-ending amount of money? top grades? national/class achievements?
even if someone has all of that, he/she might not be truly happy.
& why do i say that?

"money can't buy happiness" - as cliche as it sounds, i feel that its not entirely true as well. and of course i'm also aware that there are endless debates on that, BUT according to debate.org as to the question "Can money buy happiness?" - 47% of the people said YES and 53% said NO.

well if you asked me whether i would say yes or no,
i would say neither.
well i guess i'm neutral because i can't seem to agree or disagree.

& needless to say;
with money, you can get almost everything.
power. respect. fame. and of course, a life worth living for.
but then again, money CAN buy you happiness, but it might not be TRUE happiness. true, you can do almost everything you want with money. but are you certain that you will feel truly happy?

"well of course you can" - you may say this with 100% confidence. but hear me out first.

if i were to gave you two choices,
1) you have a loving husband and two children - you share lots of bonding with them and the family is especially close. BUT - you are poor. your husband works very hard as a sole breadwinner and you try to keep the family together and take care of the family's needs. you are poor, but you're happy.
2) you have fame, wealth and power. people respect you because of your wealth and you can flaunt your branded goods anywhere at anytime. you have a big house, but you live alone. you have a lot of friends, but you always eat alone. people respect you, but they don't care. you are rich, but you're unhappy.

well and of course this is a very general comparison and everyone or anyone is able to make up anything they want. and some of you might not think i'm right, well i'm cool with it and please feel free to think so because like i said, i'm not trying to preach, everything is just based on what i personally feel.
plus, people might think, 'you can have wealth, fame and even a happy family'. well that's true, but how many of us have all of that? one in a million? and this might not apply to each of us as everyone lives in a different situation but i feel that regardless of how blessed your life is, how wealthy you are, how healthy you are, how famous you are and how much you have - just learn how to be contented with who you are and what you have.

and you need to know - comparisons doesn't get you anywhere.

but the most contradicting thing is, the people who say all of these, like i am right now, may also find it difficult to feel truly happy sometimes. 

well the thing is - being happy doesn't mean that everything's perfect, it just means you have decided to look beyond your imperfections.

& i admit that its extremely hard to become truly happy because many things don't favour you and its hard to STAY happy because things don't always go your way. like i said, nothing is easy. to be honest, most of time i'm unhappy. i pms a lot (well i don't think its that bad like what my mom claims to be) so yup i experience a lot of bad feelings even though i hate & do not want to feel that way. i've no idea whether guys would understand this but i'm quite sure girls would understand me when i say i experience those 'sad but no idea why' feelings. like you just become sad or angry for no particular reason, you have no idea why you're feeling this way but you are anyway.
i guess it really sucks to be a female because we have to go through so many things in life ((okay not saying being guys are easy too but just saying it on a personal level)) but what to do, all we girls can do is just to blame on periods. (like seriously why do you even exist)

if you read my previous post, i've mentioned that the best way for me to de-stress and relax myself is to go for a night dip in the pool, but everyone has different ways of de-stressing themselves - like playing squash, boxing, talking to a pillow or hit the pillow, talk to a friend, cry, screaming at the top of your lungs at the beach, or just sleep. "when nothing goes right, just go to sleep" hahaha i think that's pretty much true because you can get to forget about things even if its just for a little while. well you can do ANYTHING you want but please just NEVER self-harm. 
i've heard many cases of self-harming and things like that, and it really bothers me a lot because i wish i could get them out of it.
and by saying that i mean that i would wish to be able to help those victims and of course, help them get back on their feet again.

well i know some people that are biased towards people who self-harm, because i've this guy friend who said that 'i think people who self-harm are stupid' - but mind you, they AREN'T.

people who don't understand self-harming will never do, but it's never right to call someone stupid just because of that. you never know what words can do and how deep they can cut.

or you can even go for spa or running if that makes you feel better. or if anyone who reads this are feeling low/troubled and you need help, please do not hesitate to dm me on twitter // pm me on facebook // write on my askfm because i'll try every means to help if i can! well of course i'm not extremely extremely experienced in life or extremely good in giving advices but i'm willing to try and help (ranting to someone can definitely lift your spirits up!)
don't forget - happiness depends upon ourselves.
so this sums up the first part of my post today, so learn how to be contented with yourself & what you have - remember this.

Part II: Learn to let go & love yourself.

for people who have lost their loved ones (sickness, death) or people who have lost someone precious (breaking up in r/s) in 2013 - remember to let go. for people who have lost their loved ones, do keep in mind that they live in your hearts forever and that "its not goodbye, its i'll see you soon.". & i know its not easy to let go of certain memories and even though its tough, you'll be able to overcome it soon.
just believe that you will, and you would -  because the mind believes what the heart says.
tell yourself that you're not saying goodbye to them, but just that they have left earlier and you'll see them soon. and also, constantly remind yourself that they are doing well and better in their afterlife.
quite a few important people left my life already so i've almost (well 0.00000001%) gotten used to the fact that everyone leaves one day. just don't forget to cherish those who are still around - you never know when they will leave you.
and for those who lost someone precious after losing a relationship, tell yourself you will find someone better. there's no point holding onto something that doesn't want to be held - its like no use crying over a spilt milk. just tell yourself to treat the next one better than the first.
and remember this,
wounds takes time to heal.

& of course,
learn to love yourself. to be honest, i'm still in the process of building up self-confidence and getting past my insecurities. if you wonder why, well personally i have many many many many insecurities when it comes to myself and love/relationships because i lack confidence and i have ((kinda)) trust issues sometimes. i guess its normal to have insecurities though, i'm pretty sure everyone has that. for me, i'm actually insecure about almost everything in life and that includes my looks, body, voice, talents, studies and more. if i were to list down all of my insecurities, the list would go down down and down...............
but well, like i said, i'm already trying to get over all of these and trust me i'll get over all of it one day. 
and maybe, i'll bounce back better than i was before.
so to anyone who has a lot of insecurities (like me), we should learn to let go of all these and try to love ourselves.
like what they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
well i believe all of us deserve someone who would love us & accept us for who we are.
love yourself first.
learn to let go and love yourself -remember this.

Part III: Hang in there - Persevere

& of course, life can get tough - and it will become tougher and tougher. and in some cases you might even lose yourself. well i've lost count of the number of times i wanted to stop doing everything and just die. i guess its pretty normal to feel that way? death just seem to be easy anyway. 

well i USED to think that way, but don't ever think like me. 

persevere, no matter how tough life becomes. never, ever, forget the reason why you never gave up in the first place. & tell yourself - that the future belongs to those who believe in it, so don't ever lose hope. 

and sometimes, the only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can't achieve it.


& talking about problems, i remembered something i've always wanted to say.
[well its almost of no relevance to what i've said earlier on OR what i wanted to say, but i've kept this to myself for quite a long time so just bear with me] 
well shit happens all the time but the most important thing is.............accept it and move on. everyone has their own problems, but i think the most FATAL thing to do when you start listing down your problems with a friend is to.....COMPARE YOUR PROBLEMS. [LIFE TIP 101] 
worst thing ever.
NEVER EVER do that. its the worst thing you can do - comparing your problems and saying things like "i'm in a worst state than you" or just "my problem is bigger than yours" personally i feel that its the worst thing you can do when you pour out your woes to your friend.
if you were going to start comparing problems, you're never going to win. and when you start comparing them, you feel worse. because everyone has their own problems, problems are problems no matter how big or small. and by comparing them, you're actually putting yourself in a worse state & also your friend.
your problem, no matter how big or small - just smile, because you don't own all the problems in the world.
remember this.

tell yourself life's a battle and no matter how easy or tough it is you're gonna win it anyway.

& if you ever feel sick of yourself, 
tell yourself,

well that quote kept me going after i told myself that so i guess it would also work for someone else.

and to sum everything up……..

who you are, what you are, and what you do and how you live your life doesn't matter,
[because in the end, only three things matter;
•how much you loved,
•how gently you lived,
•and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you]
- unknown
& this is old and cliche, but i'm gonna say it anyway. 

life is too short, to wake up with regrets.
love the people who treat you right & forget the ones who don't.
believe that everything happens for a reason.
if you get a chance - take it.
if it changes your life - let it.
nobody said life would be easy.
they just promised it would be worth it.

start today: stop clinging on to the past, start living in the present and hope for the future - and you shall.

and with this, i end this post with A Thing To Remember - i hope that this post will be able to inspire those who fell to pick themselves up again, people who are lost in life to find themselves back again and lastly, people who are hurt to find love again.
and above all this,
nothing worth having comes easy.
enjoy 2013while it lasts, i wish you guys a happy 2014 ahead.
[p.s. i would also appreciate it if you would leave your comments on this post or give me your feedbacks on my ask.fm @ http://www.ask.fm/cheryyyyllll ]

cheryl ♡

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