DAY FIFTY-EIGHT #346daysofgratitude


Day 58

Had a really rough night yesterday and I only woke up with swollen, puffy eyes this morning but I'm so glad that the puffiness reduced with time. During my sleep I seemed to have forgotten what happened before I slept, so I had a relatively good four hours rest, but as soon as I woke up it felt the same again: Pain. And I was also worrying about the safety of my family members who were on a plane back to Singapore, so I checked if they were back home right after I got up in the morning and boy, I'm so thankful that they are safe. Sometimes even though I may look strong and fine on the outside, I too have times (many, in fact) when I feel vulnerable and insecure. So here's a reminder for anyone who feels the same: that you're not alone in this, and it's okay to break sometimes. 

I had English class in the morning as per usual, ended class in the morning, went back to the hostel for a catnap, made oats for lunch, got ready for my Chemistry class in the afternoon and took the metro down to the Uni. It was definitely a much needed alone time after being a wreck last night hahah, and I certainly felt a little better when I mulled over what happened and tried to rationalise with a clear mind. But there were two things that happened while I was on the way back to Uni, and those two things honestly lifted my spirits up. One, I caught a glimpse of some really beautiful little daisies and flowers when I was at the bus stop, and I've no idea why but the sight of those beauties just made my day. It just made me ponder for a little and realise that the world is so beautiful, so full of life and colours, and I thought: why let this one bad event make my day dull? There are so many more things in life to appreciate and be happy about, so why let one thing diminish that spark? Gah, I'm just so thankful for Mother Nature and its everlasting beauty. 
Two, when I got on the bus I happened to sit right opposite a physically-handicapped man who was on the wheelchair. He was looking out of the window, and you know what? He was smiling. And then I realised again: There are so many more things to be thankful for. Why am I making myself feel so miserable?

So afterwards I really did feel better, and man I honestly feel that life works in amazing ways. On a shitty day I chanced upon two things that told me why I shouldn't wallow in sadness and to just dance in the rain instead of waiting for it to pass. 

I had 3.5 hours of Chemistry, anf after I was done I went to do what I was supposed to: settle the issue. We went to the beach and we talked amidst the clashing waves, and I thoroughly enjoyed the breeze and the view while I was there. I haven't been to the beach for a long time, so man I really could let my hair down (finally) yesterday. And thankfully, things got better. I decided to forgive because I mean, what's the point of holding a grudge right? Then afterwards I got back home, had late dinner, finished my tub of Vanilla bliss (sobs) for supper, then headed to Coles with Fathin to get some utensils and hangers. And when I finally settled down back in my room I filled in the travel form I took from the office, and booked my flights to MELBOURNE! Hahah that was actually my first time booking my own flight, and it was pretty fast I must say. So I'm going over to Melbourne in exactly a week's time, WHOOP I'm so excited! Gonna be staying over at Jo's place and then she's going to bring me around for just three days before both of us leave Melbourne again on the 28th, me to Hobart and Jo to Singapore. I actually wanted to fly back to Singapore too hahah, just to meet my family and friends ESP my family because I miss them so much! But I've been facetiming them almost every week so it's all good :) Really happy that things are all going okay and well all over at their side. 
So last night's sleep obviously wasn't enough, and I was just so exhausted by 11. OFF TO SLEEP. 

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